You’re quiet and don’t speak up to avoid being attacked. This person might even be a subordinate – somebody who works for you (believe me, this happens more than you might think.) You probably sense a lack of ‘parity’– that you don’t have the right to engage with this person at the same level. Or this person could be a colleague – someone who uses clever words and exerts personal power or expert power that you believe you can’t compete with.To tackle this problem, you need to understand why it is a problem in the first place.Take a look at the relationship you have with this person and how you interact.On the surface, they may come across as domineering, confrontational, demanding, hostile, or even abusive.However, with astute approach and intelligent communication, you may turn aggression into cooperation, and condescension into respect. Keep Your Cool and Maintain Composure ― Luce Irigaray, philosopher One of the most common characteristics about aggressive, intimidating, and controlling individuals is that they like to deliberately upset you in order to push your buttons, pull your strings, and keep you off balance.
If you are experiencing these intimidating behaviors where you work, then we would encourage you to seek help right away.
This person could be your boss – someone with genuine positional power over you.
Anything you do is scrutinized, challenged or faces disagreement.
My boss is aware of the situation, but he’s a non-confrontational kind of guy who doesn’t want to rock the boat.
(The merger of our two groups was his idea.) Our human resources people have often said that anyone should feel free to come to them with problems, without fear of retaliation, but I wonder if I can trust them.