Intricacies of dating a bartender

Pubs are generally sociable places, so go with the flow, talk to the regulars, have a chat with the bartender - typical English small talk topics, such as the weather or recent sporting events, will stand you in good stead.Pubs can get crowded and customers need free access to the bar. At last count there were at least eight weddings, three divorces, two children born out of wedlock, five children born in wedlock and four very happy same-sex marriages as a direct result of advice from yours truly.

4: No matter how super-smart they actually are, all your friends will think they have less than three GCSE's to their name and almost certainly in humanities subjects like drama and home economics.The simple truth is that when they spill a blue alcopop down themselves, black doesn’t show up the fluorescent drink!No amount of aftershave, perfume or cologne will cover up the smell that they bring home with them after work.5: Other women will hit on them and they will reciprocate under the guise that all bartenders need to be "professionally single." 6: On a sunny day, when you wish to frolic in the park, they will be hidden in a sweaty pit of duvet moaning in pain at the sunshine creeping through the window like the vampires of old.7: Face facts, your mother is not going to be pleased. It's literally inbuilt in our psyche to order a side of chips with every staff meal just so we won't feel famished with three hours of shift still to go. Like we'd DREAM of ordering a mojito when we know what a ball ache it is to concoct.14.

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